Finding the space to…

Over a late brunch* this afternoon, my roommate and I got into a conversation regarding the lack of space in NYC.  She talked about her growing desire, as the streets become more crowded with holiday window-shoppers and the standard walking pace picks up to balance the drop in temperature, to sneak off the treadmill and enjoy some warm cocoa and a good book by the fire.  No more subways, no more elbows and backpacks in the head, just peace, quiet and space to breathe and think.  I couldn’t help but agree.

But walking home, I started to realize the great personal irony of our “space” conversation.  Fairfield County, where I spent most of my winters until college, has tons of space.  I had every opportunity to drink hot cocoa by the fire with a book, and to enjoy the peacefulness of real quiet rather than the constant drone of traffic and movement.

And at points, I took advantage of this gift of quiet.  But as I’ve mentioned, I also couldn’t wait to move on to a new, urban space once my GA experience came to a close. In fact, by the end of my GA days, I remember feeling fairly enclosed (as I think many teenagers do), and that the vast amount of space around me made little difference because it no longer echoed my sentiments internally.

Coming back to my roommate’s comments, I agree in many respects about Manhattan: the hustle and bustle is overwhelming, challenging, and at points, obnoxious.

But even in the calamity, I know that I have found slivers of internal space that, to me, far exceed the physical space of Fairfield County.  These slivers come from the energy to be gained by encountering people with an unparalleled diversity of experience; from discovering my favorite room in the Met or being wowed by a show at the Public Theater; by stumbling into a yoga class and finding a surprising sanctuary; and by learning that creating internal quiet is a skill to be cultivated and enjoyed to the fullest.

And so, equally ironically, it seems that the massive constraints of physical space dealt by NYC somehow enable an exciting discovery of the kind of internal space necessary for the peace we desire.  If only people on the sidewalks could swing their briefcases just a little bit less…

* Brunch, by the way, is the “must do” activity of the weekend in NYC.  I found it kind of odd at first, but at this point I’m a big fan – try the place we went today if you’re in town – “Friend of Farmer” at 19th and Irving Place – yum.

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